For Your Thoughts: What I Think The Issue Of Marriage Equality Is Really About

by: Rep. Jim Splaine

Tue Mar 17, 2009 at 23:41:07 PM EDT

( - promoted by Dean Barker)

A 10 to 10 vote.  House Bill 436 took a step toward approval by surviving on a tie vote during a meeting of the House Judiciary Committee.  What it means now is that the bill will go to the House floor next Tuesday "without recommendation."  It's a position from which we can win.  

But it will take work.  All those who support full marriage equality for our gay and lesbian friends, family members, coworkers, and neighbors need to call or E-Mail their Legislators.  The vote is coming quickly.  

I want to offer to you what I think the vote of the House Judiciary Committee meant today, and what it did, even with a 10-10 tie.  As someone who has been gay for all of my life -- and openly gay since the 1980s and the recipient of considerable hate and discrimination through the years -- and a few beatings  -- I take this issue a bit personal, although I do understand differences of opinion on it and respect that.  

I'll tell you what I think the supporters of marriage equality did today...

I think that tomorrow, there will be some stories about "a real Legislative Committee" at a place called a "State House."  Those stories will report that there was a 10 - 10 vote in that Committee on a bill calling for marriage equality for our gay and lesbian New Hampshire residents.

Those stories will appear in newspapers and on WEBSITES throughout the state.  The story will be reported on radio stations and on statewide television.

Some teenagers were beaten up today in school.  Or tonight, some teenagers are severely depressed or frustrated -- they have feelings of not being like most of the other kids in school.  They might have been on the receiving end of months, or years, of jokes and demeaning comments because they might be gay or "different."  Some might even be "out" about it, but that often means they are the beneficiaries of even more open abuse in school or on the street.

But some of those teens will hear tomorrow that "a real Legislative Committee" at a place called a "State House" debated about whether to allow gays and lesbians equal treatment under our marriage laws.  Imagine, real equality for them -- as a part of our laws. Maybe being gay isn't a bad thing, and isn't all that unusual, and certainly shouldn't be a cause for hate or discrimination.

The second leading cause for suicide among teenagers is their sexual identity.  They might be gay, they might be questioning -- and many can't handle that, even today when television and information on the Internet offers more positive messages about gays and lesbians than a decade ago.  

The House Judiciary Committee vote of 10-10 was a victory in that, once again, it was clear that politicians were willing to say -- with their reputations and their votes -- that it's okay to be gay.  It's okay to be as we are and who we are.  And that the institution of government should not discriminate against someone who is gay or lesbian.

I think there is a teenager out there who will hear about the vote of the House Judiciary Committee, and he or she will not become a suicide statistic tomorrow or this week.  And, those who supported marriage equality on the House Judiciary Committee contributed to that happening.  In a very real way, I think they helped many people today.

Win or lose on the House floor next week, the dialogue we have had yet again this year about why we should not hate and should not discriminate is a move in the right direction.  It may still take a while, but every time there's a story about voices saying that it's okay to be who we are, we're touching lives.  And very likely saving a few.

We should always help people when we can.  A civilization is known by the way it treats its people, and equality is something that cannot forever be denied.  I know this issue has been tough on many people fighting for the cause -- for those in the House and Senate, for people speaking up at public hearings, for those speaking up in their communities, and for those who are willing to say publicly they are gay and are willing to fight for equality.  All of them had a very good day today.  

And for those young people who have it especially tough because they are searching for their own lives and their identity, they had a very good day today too.  

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